(Fear of trusting people due to past experiences with relationships gone bad)

There he stands, the man of my dreams, in fika.

Suddenly, I’m overcome by cingulomania.

I step back.

And I breathe.

What’s this? A tear?

This right here, this moment right here,

nothing but a distant dream.

A far cousin,

falling off the branches of my messed up family tree.

Here before me stands the love of my life,

buried many times in my heart,

a funeral held in my head many times.

Never has the words of Beyoncé had so much meaning,

“Rest in peace my one true love…”

Another tear?

As I wipe away the words I’ll never say from my face,

I look at him standing there in fika.

And then, like clockwork,

this thought sprung into my head,

“…he will never know.”

– Opus


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